Dating & Relationships

How to Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work

Long-distance relationships are something couples choose reluctantly but it’s far from being impossible. They are challenging but will also allow you to learn something new about yourself and even strengthen the bond with your partner. It isn’t easy.

On the contrary, you will feel as though missing half of your soul and sometimes even be miserable you can’t share every moment with your partner. However, with some planning, clear expectations and the right mindset, you will be able to overcome hours and miles between you. And these tips on how to make a long-distance relationship work may be just what you need to succeed.

Set a time limit

Nobody in a relationship likes to think about the end. However, a long-distance relationship might only work if you set a time limit in the first place. This is because every long-distance relationship depends on the hope that one day you two will reunite and finally be together properly.

Basically, without hoping for that happily ever after, you will both start to feel miserable and unhappy with the current arrangement. At first, love is enough, but if you don’t share the same values, over time it will be replaced by resentment. So, have that uncomfortable talk and decide what is too much time to stay apart and work toward sharing the same space before it’s up.

Don’t sacrifice more than necessary

You will undoubtedly have to make sacrifices for the long-distance relationship to work. Just make sure you don’t do it more than necessary since that leads to regret and resentment. When something unexpected happens like your time apart getting extended, take a step back and consider your newfound situation.

You can’t postpone being truly together indefinitely nor put your life on hold because of it. So, don’t isolate yourself and strive to make the most of your life to feel fulfilled and accomplished. Besides being good for your self-esteem and confidence, it will also make the time apart more bearable.

Find yourself a project

Instead of waiting for the situation to change, concentrate on something that makes you feel good. Find a new project you can work on and have the time apart go faster. This can be anything like a hobby or a new job opportunity that will become your personal project.

For example, you can start dancing lessons or take a painting class, and even something more mundane like joining a gym. Find something that will be a great distraction from the fact you are apart from each other and that will make you happy.

Take advantage of technology

A couple of decades ago, long-distance relationships depended on emails, phone calls, and even old fashioned love letters. Sometimes couples exchanged video or audio tapes with messages which took some time to reach their destinations. But today, you just need a few seconds and some taps on your phone screen to get in touch with your partner.

With so many ways to stay connected, long-distance relationships are more destined to succeed and keep the couple happy. For example, you can have dinner together over a video call or even have a movie night that way. More importantly, you can easily send a message to your partner whenever you miss them or just feel like it which makes the long-distance part less troubling.

Keep your worry in check

A lot of things come to mind when people are apart. You can even end up checking up on your partner more than calling just to say “hi.” This happens because you don’t know what your partner is doing every minute of the day and that makes your insecurities come to the surface. It’s normal for a long-distance relationship to heighten the worry about infidelity just don’t let it run your behaviour.

Instead of being secretive or suppressing your curiosity, call your partner or text them what you want to know. However, try to stay rational and keep yourself busy in order to avoid having too much free time to think about the worst scenarios. Jealousy may be cute at times, but your partner can see it as distrust and additional burden to already challenging relationships.

Benefit from thoughtful surprises

While thoughtful surprises are a great way to keep any relationship alive, they will be more meaningful for long-distance ones. Send flowers overseas even when it’s not a birthday or anniversary or book them a spa treatment after a tough week at work. If you have the time, pop up for a surprise visit for a day or two and have a wonderful time together.

People in long-distance relationships tend to think they are ignored from time to time so a nice surprise, even the smallest one can show them they are loved. Sometimes they are even more special than video calls and will keep the flame alive.

Bad visit doesn’t mean break up

You will have good and bad days in your long-distance relationship when you meet up with your partner. The latter shows up when there is too much tension between you two from the expectation and excitement of seeing each other. However, a bad visit doesn’t mean you are about to break up no matter how dramatic it may be.

Instead, stay calm and talk to your partner or cool off by doing something separately for a few hours. It’s better to speak your minds than let it pile up inside and burden you when you are away from each other.

All in all

Nurturing a relationship when your partner is hundreds or thousands of miles away is not easy. You both will sacrifice something for it to work, but you will also gain new things by being proactive and respecting your own time. Choosing a hobby and exploiting new technologies are some of the ways to survive the time apart and keep your love alive. However, do everything within a reason so both of you can feel comfortable and satisfied in your situation.

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